Column: Validation on social networks
Seeing all the comments under teen posts these days describing how beautiful and perfect we look makes me wonder why we seek validation from complete strangers. People don’t know about our struggles inside and how hard we’ve fought to avoid showing how much we really care about what other people think of us. Or how long it finally took us to feel comfortable in our own bodies and in our own features. Just for that comment complimenting us on something they can only see on the outside but not the struggles on the inside.
Girls often put themselves down for not looking a certain way someone else has done on social media. However, having a beautiful face does not mean that they have a beautiful personality. Putting others down and making them feel bad about themselves only makes you look good.
What is beautiful is how you act and how you show your kindness to others. Appearance is nothing, validation is something you don’t need because it’s not something you really need to feel confident, only something people want.
Most of the time, people simply validate you by commenting on nice things, maybe to feel good about themselves. I wonder sometimes do they write those kind words out of pity?
Anyone can pretend to think and say something behind that screen to feel good and think they’ve done someone a favor. Are we really that beautiful, perfect person we tend to think of when we see these comments?
In the mirror we see otherwise, we see someone struggling with their image because of social media and not getting “enough comments” telling them how gorgeous they look.
We believe that if we were that beautiful image on social media, that so-called perfection of a person, we might have had the ability to be loved and chosen. We would have the opportunity to be seen, heard and understood. One wonders what all these people think when they receive fewer comments on their publications than the others.
Do they ever feel like they’re not good enough because no one is validating them in the comments? Later, they will delete the message because of this major drop in trust. The beauty standard affects our confidence so much.
Why do we have to let reviews define our beauty? Why do we seek validation in those meaningless comments that decide whether we are worthy of being the beauty bearer?
Each is unique and beautiful in its own way. A number of comments or compliments shouldn’t be necessary to prove it. Allowing other people to decide this for us in comments with emojis and kind words is pointless.
It’s sad how many of us students are so insecure because of beauty standards. With this standard, it is expected that to be beautiful, you must be thin, have no flaws and have fair skin?
Beauty comes from within, you can’t be beautiful with a horrible personality. It does not work like that. Girls on TikTok are praised and go viral for looking gorgeous. When you open the comments, you see: “I would kill to watch this” or “I hope they (the significant other) don’t see this”.
It shows that they are not okay with their appearance because they see a beautiful person on TikTok or even Instagram. It makes them think they could never compare or ever be them, but that’s not true at all because they don’t need to be them.
We are all perfect as we are in being ourselves. We all have beauty within us, you may not see it, others may not see it, but there will always be someone who will, someone who really means it and not only because he can comment on anything with a click.