By the Santorini's Four
(with apologies to Edward Gorey)
A for ADULTERY and Hillary's pain,
B for the BLUE DRESS they found with a stain,
C for CIGAR, which made nation go "EEEW!"
D, DEPOSITION, which may not be true.
E for ENTRAPMENT of Clinton the cheat,
F for FELLATIO (left incomplete),
G for GRAND JURY, to which they told lies,
H for HIGH CRIMES, to which this did not rise;
I for IMPEACHMENT, Rep. Henry Hyde's dream,
J is for JORDAN, who helped with the scheme,
K is for KNEEPADS, used many a time,
L is for LIVINGSTON, killed in his prime.
M is for MONICA, tacky and cheap;
N for the NECKTIE she gave the Big Creep;
O, OVAL OFFICE, in which she unloosed him,
P for the PIZZA with which she seduced him,
Q is for QUICKIE (in other words, blow job)
R is for REVLON (at which she got no job)
S for SUBPOENA, which everyone got,
T is for TRIPP, the most foul of the lot.
U is for UNDERWEAR, flashed with abandon,
V is for VOX, which for sex was a stand-in,
W for WHITEWATER (lest we forget)
X is for X-RATED--straight to the Net!
Y for the YEAR'S WORTH of media glut--
Z is for ZIPPER--let's solder it shut.
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